Sex Toys Even a Prude Will Enjoy

Sex Toys Even a Prude Will Enjoy

Shannon Jenkins, Associate Writer, Lifestyle & Culture

No one has every accused me of being kinky. Sure, I get downright dirty when talking the talk, but when it comes to “walking the walk” I’m practically crawling backwards. I’m not a complete prude but I’m definitely a member of the “vanilla” crowd. Ever since I was a child I’ve been painfully modest. I used to be embarrassed to buy deodorant for god’s sake. A high-priced therapist could probably pinpoint what triggered my issues expressing my sexuality, but why try to fix it? I’m an artist; I’m supposed to be tortured. But not tortured as in bondage. Just mentally. You know what I mean.

The Tenga Egg ($7.50) offers a variety of internal textures.

With all that said, I’m going to tell you about sex toys. Yes, I know, it’s ironic. But just because I’m a sexual scaredy cat doesn’t mean I don’t know a good toy when I see one. Plus, I walked into Capulets/Brushtrokes Pleasures at 10:30 in the morning to browse through naughty-time gear, and I hadn’t even had breakfast yet. So cut me some slack!

The Electrosex Deluxe Digital Power Box ($130) offers a shockingly good time.

Anyway, I found two particularly interesting products at the Midtown adult store. The first gizmo to catch my eye was the Tenga Egg. You actually break open the shell and out pops an egg-shaped masturbation sleeve. The Tenga Egg comes in a variety of styles, with each offering its own individual internal texture. Just so you know, the little guy is intended for a single session, but could be used a few more times if handled and cleaned carefully.

The Autoblow Blowjob Machine ($100-$120) comes in handy on those extra lonely nights.

Next was the Electrosex Zeus Deluxe Digital Power Box, which includes adhesive pads and lead wires. It sounded like part of car kit to me, but the cashier assured me it’s a popular item. Apparently it’s a “great toy for beginners” but possesses plenty of power for even the most intense user. The currents from this gadget reportedly don’t hurt, but rather send stimulates the nerves and creates a pleasant sensation.

The CB-6000 ($130) will keep your man’s special parts safe and sound when you two aren’t together.

After my trip to the local retailer, I discovered two other intriguing gadgets—the Autoblow Blowjob Machine and the CB-6000. The former is exactly what the name describes, and offers machines for average guys (the Blast), big guys (the Max), and small guys (Pico). I’m talking endowment size, fellas. And finally, the CB-6000 is a male chastity device from the company CB-X. Complete with a padlock, this doohickey allows you to lock up your man’s junk and keep the key. Ah, peace of mind.

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Categorized | Nightlife, Urban Culture

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