Ribbons of brilliant black and white sand beaches hug the coastline as dolphins dive past whitecaps and the salty sea air blows gently on your face. A blazing sun shines radiant light on the exotic jungles and mountaintops where mantras ring out from over 20,000 temples and shrines. A peaceful Hindu population with a “live and let live” attitude towards homosexuality.

It’s no wonder they call Bali the “Island of the Gods.”

The lush Indonesian island takes a day’s travel to reach, so pack some Ambien and a Snuggie. You’ll fly into the capital city Denpasar on the southern tip of the island then make the quick 15-minute drive into the village of Canggu.

Villa Warisan is the gay-friendly place for your Bali stay. The grand villa is hidden away amongst the sweeping rice paddies, making for ample seclusion, but it still gives you a striking ocean view. The rooms have a classic Balinese flair with an upscale touch—think bamboo and 600 thread count sheets.

Make a break for Petitenget Beach without delay—it’s Bali’s version of Fire Island. You’ll lose count of the number of teeny tiny Speedos, but also keep an eye out for wetsuit-clad hotties—Petitenget is a primo surfing destination.

Rent a board and give the swells a try or hire a sunbed and lounge for the day. Just be careful if a tempting local offers his company for the day—they’ll likely expect to be paid.

Callego Restaurant & Massage is right on the beach but skip the uninspired eats and order a colada or a cold Bintang—the best selling beer in Indonesia. They’ll deliver it right to your sunbed so you can stay where the action is.

After a change of clothes, go to Gado Gado. The exclusive restaurant on the beach loves its gays. Try the seared tuna with cucumber and shallot marmalade as you take in the idyllic setting on the sea.

Navigating Bali is a cinch—you can circle the entire coast by car in one day. Luckily one of the most extraordinary temples in the world is just 15 minutes from your villa. Tanah Lot temple sits on a rock formation shaped steadily over the years by the ocean tide. The 15^th century shrine is a cultural icon reportedly built to worship the Balinese sea gods.

Take a moment at Tanah Lot for yourself as the sun sets over Bali. Reflect on your beliefs and be inspired by the beauty surrounding you. The world is evolving and true pride is becoming gospel.

Sterility can make for an unhappy home. It can do likewise for an unhappy restaurant. When we want cozy, when we want loungy, when we don’t want to light up the freaking grill and wash the dishes ourselves, we want Truva.

The Mediterranean fusion hotspot’s main dining room sinks down a step, creating a needed separation from the bustle outside on Andrew Young International Boulevard. It’s like you’re stepping down into your own living room after a long day.

Home for the evening could be the cream-colored wraparound leather banquette, or maybe the booths bathed in orange and green. The banquette’s the choice if you’re feeling social, the booths if you want your own space.

Who wants a drink? The wine list at Truva is simple and to the point, much like your wine list at home. But if nothing grabs you, the large, fully-stocked bar will.

Fenuxe loves the cigar shaped meat pastry. No, seriously. It’s a warm app, a hearty mixture of beef, lamb, and herbs wrapped in phyllo dough.

A look at Truva’s entrees gives you the answer to why Mary had a little lamb—Truva apparently killed them all. From chops to shanks, roasted to stuffed, you get all the variations on lamb you can imagine.

The shank beats them all. The lamb is tender as expected but the coriander and mint braising is the uncommon touch we look for. Like the rest of Truva’s entrees, the portions are HUGE so make room in the fridge for leftovers.

We usually satiate the sweet tooth at home with some Breyers or Firefly vodka. At Truva, it’s something we would never try in our kitchen—kazan dibi. It’s a rich, creamy flan-like dish with a cinammon bite.
And with the last bite you can lean back and keep relaxing because there are no dishes to do tonight. It’s a lovely night out at Truva, where you get the satisfying flavors you crave with an at-home appeal.

If a lovely British lady walks up to you and your pooch in Piedmont Park and gives you a helpful dog-rearing tip, we suggest you listen to her. That lady is bound to be the world-renowned dog trainer and host of Animal Planet’s smash hit show “It’s Me or the Dog”: Victoria Stilwell.

Stilwell took time away from the production of the show’s next season to talk with FENUXE about the virtues of positive reinforcement, her love of Atlanta, and why the gays make great dog owners.

FENUXE: So you and your family moved to Atlanta? Welcome!

Victoria Stilwell: Yes we did. My husband is from Atlanta, he grew up in Sandy Springs. I started visiting here when I first met my husband which was about 13 years ago and I fell in love with the place immediately because it reminded me of where I grew up in England. Especially the green leafy suburbs felt very familiar to me.

FENUXE: Did they have The Varsity there?

Stilwell: [laughs] No they don’t have The Varsity over in Britain. That’s an experience in itself. I was taken to the Varsity though. I just remember a lot of grease but it sure tasted good.

FENUXE: What do you and the family like to do here?

Stilwell: I have a kid so I like to do a lot of things to entertain her. We’re members of the Botanical Garden, we love going there. It’s a real gem in this city, especially now with the expansion. We love going to Stone Mountain. I mean my God there’s so much. And then my parents live up in the mountains in North Georgia so we go there a lot. That’s what Atlanta gives, you’ve got an hour to go to the mountains and you’ve got beautiful lakes. It’s a great place to raise children.

FENUXE: Do you have pets?
Stilwell: Yes, I have a chocolate labrador called Sadie. She was a rescue. Because of our jobs and moving around so much, it wasn’t until two years ago that we could have our own dog and Sadie came into our lives. Her owner had died and she needed a home so we took her in.

FENUXE: You use positive reinforcement as the basis for your dog training. Why do you think that’s the best way?

Stilwell: Because I think it’s in tune with the dog’s basic psychology. The whole traditional style of training that relies very much on a human dominance, animal submission policy has been proven by scientific research to be highly detrimental to your relationship with your dog both on a psychological and a physical level. When you use positive reinforcement you’re training your dog to follow you because it wants to, not because it fears what’s going to happen to it if it doesn’t, which is what the old dominance-based methodology relies on. I just think the smartest leaders are the ones that can influence behavior without using force.

FENUXE: Have you ever corrected a dog owner while you’re out in public?

Stilwell: Oh yes absolutely. I was on the beach in Florida during the winter and there was a guy who had a labrador, and each time a dog went past his labrador it lunged really aggressively and then the guy would roll the lab on its side and hold it down till the dog submitted. That’s called an alpha role. The whole premise is that if you hold your dog down, it calms down—actually it doesn’t.

So I went up to him and introduced myself and worked with him for about half an hour. We did playtime as other dogs went past and it began to look at other dogs like “Okay, that dog coming by means we can play now,” and I’m like, “Yeah, we play now.” So in half an hour we got that dog from lunging aggressively at other dogs to playing with other dogs. But you need to reinforce training like that, it’s not a quick solution.

My biggest pet peeve—and I might sound like I go around policing everything but I don’t—is when people let their dogs poop and they don’t pick it up. It’s highly toxic, one of the worst chemicals that you can have and it seeps into our water system. I’ll go up and give a bag to the person and say “Oh I think you forgot to pick up after your dog” and they look at me and go “Oh yes, I did.” Whatever.

FENUXE: And they never realize it’s a world famous dog trainer coming up to them?

Stilwell: Oh yes they do, less and less do I have anonymity now. They recognize me and they go “Oh shit! She’s gonna cuss me out!” [laughs]

FENUXE: Have you had gay couples on the show before?

Stilwell: Yes! I worked with two lovely women two years ago, they were one of the first people I worked with for the American series. They live here in Atlanta and are now such good friends of ours. I’ve had male couples as well. We always have a good time, we always have a good laugh.

FENUXE: Do you notice any similarities or differences between gay pet owners and straight pet owners?

Stilwell: For me, I think maybe the gay couples tend to be better dog owners in some respects, because they just seem to give more time. I’ve noticed a little trend where they do make excellent dog owners because they take the time and effort to really understand and work with their dogs.

This is such a freaking judgmental world and it would be so much easier if everyone could just live how they wanted to live as long as they’re not hurting anybody, you know? That’s my attitude.

*For expert dog training advice and to learn more about positive reinforcement, visit Victoria Stilwell’s website www.positively.com.

When you’re heading out to grab a cocktail or two, who says you can’t bring Bruiser along? You just need a gay-friendly and dog-friendly destination, so FENUXE pinpoints your path!

Midtown is packed with options for you and your pooch to knock one back. Hotel Indigo sets aside Tuesday nights especially for the dogs. They’re allowed on the patio from 6 to 9PM, water bowls and dog treats are provided and there’s even a special dog menu if you want to order up some eats.

You can top off a trip to Piedmont Park’s new dog park with a drink in almost every direction. Quattro on the north side, Park Tavern on the southeast side and Joe’s on Juniper on the southwest side all allow dogs right on the patio.

Buckhead’s Thirsty Dog Tavern is becoming the “Cheers” of dog-friendly watering holes. Their lower patio has a grassy area for play and dog bowls are provided. There’s a dog menu for the hungry hound and a dog-themed cocktail list for thirsty parents. FENUXE recommends the Tropical Terrier—pineapple vodka with a splash of pineapple juice and Sprite.

You can pull a pup-themed pub crawl with all the pet-friendly finds in Decatur. Matador and Universal Joint don’t allow them on the patio but you can tie the leash on the fence, while Mojo’s Pizza and Steinbeck’s allow all-access while you’re drinking outdoors.
If you’re movin’ on up to the Eastside, trendy cantina Dakota Blue provides the water bowls so you can both imbibe, while Brewhouse Cafe in Little 5 lets you linger with your four-legged friend by your side.
So no matter the area of town, there’s always a place for you and your buddy to kick back and enjoy the city’s nightlife with treats for the both of you!

Wondering what’s up with that extra wag in your dog’s tail lately? Because they sense it. After several months and “ruffly” $1.5 million worth of renovations, the new Piedmont Park dog park is officially open.

The park will have an exclusive grand opening event August 12^th where your little one can get a sneak peak at the new setup. It’s where all the A-list pups will go to see and be seen, so make sure to break out the swarovski leash and give them a spritz of Oh My Dog.

The result is well worth the wait. Piedmont Park Conservancy went bigger and bolder by carving out a nearly 3-acre dog run with new trails and landscaping. But the park’s perks aren’t just for Fido. There are more benches, new watering features and, for the first time ever, a concessions area and restrooms!

As always, there are separate enclosures for both large and small dogs so there’s a slice of doggie heaven for everyone from dachshunds to great danes. They thought of everything short of a redwood-sized fire hydrant.

So make it a (play)date and see what the commotion is all about at the new dog park at Piedmont Park. And a little hint: the muscle-bound guy carrying the teacup yorkie? He’s family.

See you there!

Piedmont Park Dog Park Grand Opening

August 12^th, 6-8PM

$5 entry includes refreshments and take-home doggy bag

$10 includes all of the previous plus caricature souvenir

*entry fee required only for Aug. 12 event, dog park is free thereafter

At the gay dance club of the pet world, dogs and cats would get escorted past all the other animals to a VIP booth stocked with toys designed by Donatella Versace. But what about the pets at the end of the line?

Tortoise

A tortoise is not for the commitment-phobes—they can live up to 100 years. But these rugged reptiles return the investment with their friendly nature and submissive attitude. And they’ve perfected the emerging “grumpy cute” look.

Tarantula

A tarantula is perfect if you want something low maintenance and have

a fear of intimacy—this ain’t your cuddle bug. Plus it’s a great date test. Show it to your butch, baseball-cap wearing stud and watch him scream like Ross from “Chelsea Lately” at a JoBros concert.

Kissing Gourami

Male varieties of the kissing gourami fish will lock lips with each other during a fight, creating your very own aquatic version of “Oz.” But they’re mostly peaceful creatures and like our grandmother always told us, nothing’s more soothing than an aquarium full of bi-curious fish.

Lovebird

Lovebirds have all the qualities of a great partner: intelligent, great personality, affectionate. They’re gorgeous too, which will either make you adore them or spread spiteful rumors about them at Burkhart’s. Either way, lovebirds are quite the catch.

Ball Python

Ball pythons are so named because they curl up into a ball when threatened. So if you’re going to have a snake as a pet, why not get the biggest wimp in the species? They’re docile, easy to handle and the name itself is good for years of off-color jokes.

Ferret

Do you know any dogs that do a clumsy, spastic series of joyous sideways and backwards hops after playtime called a “weasel war dance”? Didn’t think so. But a ferret does. And in-between the war dances and the cuteness, they sleep for about 16 hours a day.

Guinea Pig

It’s practically an unspoken rule that once you move to Midtown, your brand new pet isn’t far behind. Non-profit pet organizations like PAWS and PALS Atlanta have a huge presence in the LGBT community. The Piedmont Park Conservancy just put an additional $1.5 million into renovating the dog park, quite likely the gayest dog park in the nation.

These aren’t coincidences. Harris Interactive conducted a poll on pet ownership and found that while 63% of straight respondents were pet owners, the number jumped to 71% for LGBTs. So pets are an important part of our lives, more so than other groups. But what about our background makes us more likely to fawn over our pets? What situations affecting our community inevitably make us more likely to take in a cat or dog who needs a home? Are we creating our own type of family unit or is it something more?

We Stand Corrected

The LGBT community’s exposure to homophobia from a young age may have something to do with our love of pets.

“People that are gay grew up and were marginalized and didn’t have acceptance from other people,” says Brett Rozen, a psychotherapist who specializes in LGBT issues. “Pets are a wonderful way to get the care they didn’t get growing up.”

It’s a situation known in the psychological community as a corrective experience. When one grows up being denied love or acceptance, they either shut down emotionally or seek out new sources of that long-denied acceptance.

“Pet’s don’t cast judgments on us or our lifestyles,” says Rozen. “They provide a corrective experience in that they demonstrate unconditional acceptance and love.”

Pursuit of Happiness

A gentle cat or dog could be added right alongside popular pharmaceutical drugs like Lexapro and Zoloft in aiding the treatment of depression. Since studies show greater incidents of depression in the LGBT community, the need becomes greater for a little companion.

That need for companionship and love goes into overdrive for those living with HIV/AIDS, who typically experience even greater levels of depression than most. The UCLA School of Public Health conducted a study examining the health benefits of pet ownership among people with HIV/AIDS.

Those with AIDS who didn’t own a pet were three times more likely to experience depression than men who didn’t have AIDS. And men with AIDS who had a pet were only 50 percent more likely to experience depression compared to men without AIDS. Basically, pet owners with AIDS show significantly lower rates of depression than those without pets.

And aside from the love and companionship provided inside the home, some pets force those dealing with depression to get outside and socialize.

“Pets, such as dogs, get people out of the house, which is normally the last thing someone with depression or anxiety wants to do,” Rozen says. “While outside, people with pets become more approachable and give others a reason to stop and talk.”

The Family That Plays Together…

Ultimately, the big gay embrace of pets could be traced back to the simple search for family.

The “traditional” avenues of having children are not so traditional in the LGBT community. Surrogates, adoption, artificial insemination—when it comes down to difficult choices like these and the expense involved, many gay people turn to a pet to complete their family.

When looking back on the love we share and who we share it with, we (hopefully) give it to those who will love us unconditionally, without judgment or spite. When that love is delivered in all furry fours or on a perch, who are we to deny it?

Quietly nestled on a side street off Pharr Road in Buckhead lies a charming bungalow serving fine dishes of the French variety. The dining room is bustling but it’s the tree-shaded patio we’re headed to with a special dinner companion in tow.

Anis Cafe & Bistro isn’t just a familiar stop for the gays, it’s the only fine dining eatery in the city that allows friendly pooches to accompany you on your evening on the patio.

The drink order for your little friend is precise (“a water, neat, in a pail s’il vous plait”), but yours is easier thanks to the charming young waitstaff. They’ll parse through 50 different wines in style, making the choice seem obvious in the end. A nice Provence rosé will do the trick, with a visit to Anis feeling like a lazy summer night on the Rhone.

The mussels are a treat, but if you’re feeling frisky for your first taste, sample the coquilles St. Jacques. Roasted Maine scallops, sweet corn, truffle honey, and vidalia onions give this dish a sweet Southern twist.

The next step on your stop is to queue up the joue de veau braisé. These braised veal cheeks are served over orchiette pasta with fava beans, grape tomatoes, and garlic jus. After a gentle pet, distract your doggy from the sensuous smells with a milkbone or two.

The crème brulée is tempting but it’s the apple tart that always calls our name. A flaky puff pastry surrounds it, creating a sweet, soft dance with the gooey tart inside.

A final sip of the rosé swishes down, completing the culinary expedition just as night falls. You head back across the patio with your pooch diligently by your side as the summer wind rustles the trees. It feels like France yet you know you’re home. It’s Anis Cafe & Bistro.

Atlanta’s animal shelters help pets in the same way CHRIS Kids helps homeless LGBT youth—treat them and help them find loving homes. There are a variety of animal shelters throughout the city doing noble work. They not only need homes for the pets but they need financial assistance to continue their work. FENUXE shines the spotlight on five fighting the good fight.

The Dekalb Humane Society was renamed PAWS Atlanta in December 2002, and the non-profit Decatur shelter has continued to shine since. They’ve rescued and adopted out over 30,000 cats and dogs. They continue to host gay-friendly events including the Canine Fashion event at the Artmore this past May.

www.pawsatlanta.org

Back in 2002, Samantha Shelton was frustrated with finding a home for a stray cat and her kittens so she started FurKids. It is now one of the top charities in the country, with over 5,000 cats and dogs being rescued and adopted through her work.

www.furkids.org

Atlanta is home to one of the oldest humane agencies in the country, the Atlanta Humane Society. AHS has rescued an immeasurable amount of animals since opening their doors in 1873. To give you an idea of their impact, they found homes for over 8,300 cats and dogs last year alone.

www.atlantahumane.org

The non-profit Barking Hound Village Foundation provides animal care through Fulton County Animal Services. Barking Hound is dedicated to saving the lives of the lost, unwanted and abandoned cats and dogs throughout Fulton County.

www.fultonanimalservice.com

Over 10,000 dogs and cats have found stable homes thanks to Atlanta Pet Rescue. The non-profit Midtown shelter is open and helping 7 days and week and houses about 40 dogs and 10 cats a day.

www.atlantapetrescue.org

Fashion doesn’t limit its victims to just people. Whether feline or canine, the competition to stay on top of the latest trends is a wild one. FENUXE found an expert in animal magnetism to make sure your four-legged friend doesn’t end up on next year’s worst-dressed list.

Nichole Ferguson is the owner of Glamour Paws, Virginia-Highlands’ primo pet boutique and spa. They specialize in pet fashion and “creative” grooming.

Oftentimes, fashion trends get passed down from owners to pets and this season is no exception when it comes to the hair of the dog: mohawks have the momentum. The color depends on the coat but the top five shades of the summer are red, blue, teal, pink and purple.

Cats are a bit “touchy” when it comes to styling their hair…or doing anything else that invades their personal space. So coloring is a no-go, but make them stand out with a cut. The lion is the look to keep your kitty cool: a shaved body paired with a fluffy head, tail and paws. Rarrr!

The leash laws for the cat and pup are simple this season: get a crystal Fabuleash. There’s a wide array of colors and price levels, starting with a simple $15 piece all the way up to a stunning Swarovski crystal leash for $300. You can get your collar in crystal as well, but it’s not for everyday use—call it their evening collar.

And for the fancy pet on the go, this just in: carriers from Juicy Couture in pink velour with brown leather trim.

The final touch after wowing the sense of sight is a French fragrance. A spritz of “Oh My Cat?” or “Oh My Dog!” and your little beauty queen or king will be the toast of the Midtown fashionistas!