Signed,
XP needing X-Perience

Dear soon to be XXX-P,
Actually, this sounds like a really great conversation starter. First, buy yourself a laptop. For reference, I like to walk into Good Purchase or MP3 Shed and ask them to point me to a computer that will let me simultaneously G-Chat, play Angry Birds and look up Kim Kardashian’s measurements. Apparently almost any machine can do that these days (like, any machine, not just computers; phones, dishwashers, lamps, etc).

Now, take your lovely new PC purchase to anyplace featuring a “We have WiFi!” sticker on the door. Er, well, take it to a coffee shop. I do not understand the appeal of WiFi in a restaurant…I mean really…you’re there to eat. If your social life is such that you need an Internet connection to have a dining companion, you are beyond my help.

I should have mentioned earlier to look super hot, but I figured you already are. So, computer in hand. Perch your booty in a high-traffic area, maybe right by the organic wooden stirrers and raw sugars, and shake your head in annoyance. Sigh, if need be. Continue to look frustrated until you land a tech-savvy cutie. Ta da!

One thing though: your definition of tweeting is clearly far more interesting than what the word actually means, so I suggest you stick with it forever.

Jim Farmer, Festival Director, had this reaction: “I am absolutely thrilled. Out on Film is a very small organization. The recognition of the good work we are doing, the quality programming we schedule and the diverse crowds we reach is a huge compliment. It’s been our goal from the minute we became independent to make Out on Film the best film festival it could be, one for our entire community.”

The festival is slated to take place from September 29 thru October 6 at the Midtown Art Cinema. They have announced three films so far; “We Were Here” which chronicles the early days of the AIDS crisis in San Francisco, “Wish Me Away” a documentary about country music singer Chely Wright’s coming out and the Hebrew Musical “Mary Lou” from director Etyan Fox.

So, I’ve always kind of kept to myself and did my own thing. I am kind of the all-American type. I was born in Cobb County and after graduating from Kennesaw State I landed a job in downtown Atlanta. I rented an apartment in midtown and I am trying to get involved in the local scene. I guess this is my problem: I am excited to live in town, but I feel kind of isolated. Since I was born and raised in the suburbs I don’t immediately come across as gay. When people finally find out they either think I have been hiding it or they think I am trying to be someone I’m not. I like your column and the wacko advice you give people. Give me some crazy advice of how to fit in and it might just work!

Signed,
Awaiting a response on Argonne

Dear Aragorn (the LOTR guy?):

Are you telling me that people make judgments about how you live your life based on the way you dress, talk and present yourself without bothering to get to know the real you? What kind of place is it that you live in?! Just normal middle America you say? Oh yeah, that is what we do here.

So, it is your responsibility to straighten…er…clear up any areas of misconception. You can easily work into conversation the fact that you’re gay without it being awkward. For example, when a coworker asks you what you did this weekend, simply reply “the boyfriend and I did some yard work, played video games, hung out. And then we had hot gay sex.” Or, if you’re single, you might tell them “I slept in, then went for a long run and took a shower, meditating on how I am attracted solely to males and not females.” Totally normal conversation nuggets! Thank me later.

Or just make the “interested in males” portion of your Facebook public. Every new person you meet is going to go look at it anyway.

Emmy award winning CNN anchor Don Lemon acknowledges publicly that he is gay and a victim of child molestation in his new memoir Transparent. I have known Don for a few years and while doing this interview, I detected a happier and wiser man … I applaud his bravery and hope telling his story not only brings him peace, but also enlightens the many readers of his new book.

Don, why this book and why now?
I was approached to do a book about success and, after careful consideration; I thought to myself “why not do a book the makes a difference?” I wanted to write the truth about my life; I wanted to share who I was and where I came from.

You share your experiences of being a victim of child molestation. Who did this to you? How did you cope? How did you recover?
It was a friend of the family. I dealt with each incident individually; I healed in between each of the molestations. I believe grace healed me I was luckier than most that I could disconnect and let it be the past.

I have had the pleasure of meeting your lovely Southern mother. How did she and the family deal withall that was revealed?
The toughest part has been answering questions about my personal life. My mother has always been accepting but now she has had to face public questioning – and it’s tough for a parent. She is strong but I feel for her. Other members of the family don’t understand why I am “airing my dirty laundry.”
Despite all of these challenges, I want to encourage folks to live their truth. Those who have the question, “is it ok to come out” I say YES it is ok.

What have been the positives/negatives of sharing your personal story?
I have had people reach out to me and say that they found the courage to come out and live their authentic lives because I came out publicly – that’s intense feedback. On the other hand I hate that my family has to live through it, too.

The title of the book is “Transparent.” To what does that refer?
There is no question off limits. This book has been liberating and freeing. I hope my candor can help people who are looking for authenticity. As a man who grew up in the South, I understand the challenges facing a gay man, a gay African- American man. I don’t want anyone to harm themselves because of these issues – I feel that as an adult man, I have to help however I can and this is my way.

Don Lemon’s revealing book can be found at Outwrite Bookstore and Brushstrokes.
By Dino Thompson-Sarmiento